Paddy's Day

Being Paddy's and being the special day that it is I prepared for over a month in advance by growing a beard with the specific purpose of dying it green for Paddys Day. I heard St Patrick himself died his beard green before banishing all the snakes (and Germans) from Ireland way back in the glory days.

Armed with my festive beard and a really tall funny looking walking stick i set of in search of St Patricks own holy grail, a funny hat. Now who doesn't like a funny hat on Paddy's day. Nobody can begrudge any man or woman (or German) a funny hat on Paddys Day, thats a rule I just made up. So here comes hat No. 1
Its an alright hat, simple enough English bolar style hat, but theres not much to laugh at there, so the search moved on. And it didn't have long to go until we found the Holy Grail, hat No.2

This hat I picked off the head of a leprechaun running at full speed through the pub. This hat gave me the amazing power of getting away with licking random girls on the side of the face. Quite a magical hat indeed.