Domestic Violence

I had a dream this morning I got a lift home from a church in dublin to sligo with Bertie Ahern in a Mercedes A-class. He was given some sermon I was just standing outside like I used to when I was a kid. Anyway snap back to reality, whoops there goes gravity

Last night after a very patient few hours waiting for my "missing" phone and shorts to come back, I decided to put in a stolen property report with the cop across the street. When I walk in to the cop shop (a room) theres one cop and a load of lads sitting around drinking tea. The duty manager of my hotel is ripping the piss out of me and translating my statement to Vietnameese when a woman crashes through the door with blood pissing out ofd her head. I decide I aint gettin no report tonight and head of to get some food. Before I go I offer one of the porters 50,000 Dong to get my phone back. Thats $3's. And low and behold when I come back my phone has been miraculously been found.

Its all good now, and Beans just farted on my hand. Not really, I'm just ripping his urine